dried from oversqueezing

i want to write something now that i am so free and this was what i said i wanted to do. of course i hope whatever was churned out can generate money in addition to providing satisfaction. however, due to reasons unknown to me, i could not squeeze something out. i felt extremely dry. am i doing it the wrong way? working backward? hmph.!

somewhere in my life, have i locked all my imagination and threw the key away because reality was laughing at me and my imagination? have i been so successful in conforming that i no longer dared to dream anymore?

when it's a stress to become myself, i know i've got it wrong. i am already me, what's there to become? sheesh. i think i will not repeat this to myself once i fully believe it. :)

like, sad.

i don't like me now and its a sad thing.