Monday, April 13, 2009

there's more

sometimes i wonder i'm where He wants me to be.

sometimes i wonder if truly listen, and follow only when it suits me.

i'm wondering if i'm lukewarm and comfortable with it.

i wonder if i'm more concerned with how people see me than how i want to be seen by Him.

i wonder if i have traded my self for acceptance.

i wonder if i think too much. and do too little. and pray even less.

i don't know who i am, and have i, in my quest to find myself, lost sight of Him?

i read a friend's blog today, whom i discovered through links here and there. it's amazing how God is using her in her life, and made me realise i am not giving my life fully for the One who gave His for me. it made me sad, it also woke me up. prayer is a 2-way communication, i can't be the only one talking. i want to persist in listening, though i can't recognize the voice, yet i will remember that He is full of grace, and He is God.

i am actually thankful that He allows storms in my life, so i look for shelter in Him. i hope that every obstacle nudges me closer to Him. but i pray that that's not just it. when i walked to the front and said i dedicate my life to Him, i want to live it. there's more potential released when i surrender. there is courage needed in surrendering. even to the hands of a loving God.

1 comment:

jasmine said...

Somehow i managed to find ur blog from ur old blog and from another person's blog. Haha...

I dun really read blogs but since i read a post or two of urs, thought maybe i should drop u a message to say hi! "HIEEE!!"

I say, from the way u r blogging, you are still on the right track with Him. I guess at certain point of life, everyone will feel the same. Well, at least u r still thinking and talking about Him. That speaks alot better than me i supposed. Haha... backsliden me. Dun worry min. you can do it!!